Category — Engaged Encounter

No couple is perfect. And we ALL argue. Here are today’s questions.

1. How are we different in the ways that we argue? (ex. ignore, withdraw, attack)

2. Choose the topics that you are least open with your fiance about. Discuss why it is difficult to be open about them.
-My Family
-Education
-Marriage Responsibilities
-Careers 
-Habits
-Fear of Failure
-Children
-Lifestyles
-Previous marriage/relationship
-Friends
-Roles in marriage
-Conflict Resolution 
-Sex
-Dual career family
-Living together before marriage
-In-Laws
-Drinking/Drugs
-Hobbies/free-time/sports
-Values
-Health
-Job related traveling
-Religion
-Financial matters
-The way you treat  me
-other

I am a big advocate of “love is a decision, not a feeling.”  The feeling of being “in love” will not always be there, there will be days, maybe weeks or months, that you are angry with someone. But by committing yourself to marry that person, you are committing to be with them forever, through the good and the bad. So many people get divorced these days and I believe that it is because they go into their marriage with the thought that if it doesn’t work out, they can always leave. You are asking for trouble if you believe that way. 

Today’s questions:

1. When was a time that I had to set aside what I was feeling in order to make the decision to love you?

2. When was a time when making the decision to love you lead to great joy?

Good morning! Today I have taken work off in order to get some wedding stuff done.

10:00 AM meet with florist
1:00 PM meet with Samantha (MOH) about shower and bachelorette party
3:00 PM 3rd (and hopefully final) fitting

Since I will be in and out I have prepped this post early, and will post some updates throughout the day. Yesterday I spoke briefly about my experience at Engaged Encounter, the Catholic Church’s marriage prep counseling weekend.  I highly recommend this, or if you are not catholic then something similar, to everyone.  I know that not everyone is married in a church, and that whoever is marrying you may not require pre-marital counseling, so I want to post some of the questions that I found most useful here.  Some of them will be about God and Faith, so if those don’t apply to you feel free to skip them

The way to do this is to have you and your significant other answer the questions alone, in separate rooms if possible, and then to come together to discuss.  I hope that these questions will help someone out there Not to become sure of their choice, but to simply grow closer and to be even more confident that you are headed into a stable and life long marriage. 

Ok, the first two questions:

1. What specific characteristics do I see in myself that make it more difficult for others to know and love me?

2. Our family backgrounds have a lasting influence on who we are today. What are three strengths from my family that I bring to our relationship? What are three weaknesses from my family that I bring to our relationship?

Good luck!

(image source)